I taught a webinar last night, sharing why we are all so overloaded , why so many women have adrenal fatigue and the treatment and strategies to help “Burnout Syndrome.”
One of the questions at the end of the webinar has prompted this post. The discussion was how do we as women tend to our needs and make ourselves a priority. Endless and countless self help authors tells us to love ourselves more and that we have to put the airplane mask on ourselves before our children. But I have to tell you my clinical perspective on this is completely different.
You see, if it were that easy, women wouldn’t struggle with this. It’s not that they don’t love themselves or find themselves worthy to look and feel well. I don’t completely agree with this sentiment, instead I see it’s more about their UNBALANCED STATE.
This extends beyond this application to women and is true for every patient that I work with. When we, (me included) are unbalanced we cannot care for ourselves. It’s not a matter of willingness or unwillingness we just can’t! We are STUCK! Stuck in the unbalance of emotions, pathology and illness and this can be small for some and larger and more debilitating and consuming for others.
When we are in an unbalanced state we can’t tend our needs, we can’t ask for our needs to be met, we are in survival and just trying to get through, stay upright and remain intact. No healing or self development comes until the state is shifted to one of balance through the constitutional and anti miasmatic medicines.
I want to share a case to explain this clinical principle —
One of my patients, a 43 year old woman, she is fit, runs a pilates studio and has a fulfilling life with her husband and her 3 children. She came to me as she couldn’t stop her weight from fluctuating. She would emotionally eat and identified her self destructive eating habits were links to more self destructive emotional feelings that she had experienced since she was 26.
This case is not about weight gain or weight loss, it’s not even about adrenal fatigue or thyroid imbalance this is a case of the mind! This is a mental health case that as soon as she received her constitutional homeopathic remedy her eating habits completely changed overnight. After all she has the knowledge and the motivation, she is a pilates instructor, she knew what healthy habits to change and how to achieve this. She was not stuck in her knowledge or her love for herself and desire to look and feel better. She was stuck in her mind, she couldn’t stop her self sabotage.
As soon as the first few doses of her medicines kicked in she called me asking if the remedy response could be this quickly. She was already shifting in her mind to one of greater optimism and self discipline. She fed her family dessert but had the self control to say no, something she had not been able to achieve for months before the remedies were in her system. She noticed her food choices shifted easily, she wasn’t craving the junk foods or sleeping in and missing her exercise like previously.
What had the remedies achieved for her? The remedies had shifted her state to one of balanced and aligned. She was no longer stuck in her unbalanced state where she couldn’t care for herself in the way she knew how and wanted to. This was not about motivation or desire this was about her being stuck in an unbalanced state.
This is the case for so many of my pateints, they are stuck in old patterns of trauma, PTSD, grief and emotions of the past or even in the present which prevent the balanced true self from expressing itself.
We do know how to care for ourselves and love ourselves, deep down this is innate and can be achieved when our vital force is balanced and activated. We can then be empowered and our decisiveness for self care to come through. Homeopathic Medicine is mind/body medicine, not in a fluffy and ‘woo woo’ way, in a calculated, clinically assessed and logical, progressive way.
Homoeopaths take a long case and analyze medical history and all the symptoms in the mind and the body of the patient. From there we assess and calculate our prescriptions from over 4000 possible Homoeopathic Medicines to remove the obstacles to cure.
This is what was achieved for this case I have shared. Her obstacles to cure were removed so that her balanced state could be restored where she has lost all of her weight and adheres to the lifestyle and fitness habits that are important to her. Occassionally she will email me, every few weeks or months and ask if she can repeat the dose of the constiutional and anti miasmatic medicines as those same symptoms of feeling stuck and self sabotage will come up again and she will feel unbalanced. Once the medicines are repeated for a few doses it shifts her state back to balanced and she goes back to her thriving state of mental health and physical wellbeing.
So my question remains, do you get what you need? Most of the time I see the answer to this as yes — if you are in a balanced state you create for yourself this optimum scenario in your life or you ask for help. In an unbalanced state we rarely get what we need. We feel depleted, unfulfilled, resentful and often taken from by others. We don’t reach for the things we need, we don’t have the conversations to ask for help. Not because we don’t believe we are deserving of them but because we are stuck in this unbalanced state where we can barely serve ourselves let alone others…